Tag: mother-daughter

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Coming of Age Ceremony for Girls Filmed

Under the light of the Full Moon, I am trembling to share my enormous gratitude to everyone I have ever circled with.  It is thanks to my friends, students, colleagues, teachers and family that I stand here with the capacity to celebrate and share with you that there is a practical path toward toward the vision that every girl on the planet can be mentored in the lore of womanhood.

Fort Collins Coming of Age  Ceremony Filmed 

Most especially I wish to thank the women and girls of Maiden Discovery Circle, Fort Collins, Colorado, who invited Journey of Young Women and Warrior Films to their Coming of Age Ceremony for Girls last weekend.  We captured some amazing video footage of ceremony under the open sky as well as interviews with moms, mentors, and the girls.

Coming of Age Ceremony

Coming of Age Ceremony, Fort Collins, CO, 11-21-15. Photo by Lillian Krueger

It took my breath away when this community agreed to open up their coming of age ceremony to be filmed - a courageous act of vulnerability in service to vision. These woman and girls are on fire to show the world what it looks, sounds and feels like to usher girls into womanhood with intentionality, joy and mentorship. To show moms what is possible for their daughters, and for themselves. To remind everyone that girls thirst for mentorship and for circling with women and girls....and that every woman has gifts to offer girls on their journey to womanhood.

Co-led by Gina Loughrige, a graduate of the JOYW Mentoring Girls Certificate Training, this Girls' Circle has been meeting every other week for two years.  I cannot wait to share some of the video footage of this coming of age ceremony with you and to tell you more about their story.

Warrior Films

I am delighted and grateful beyond measure to be working in collaboration with Frederick Marx and Warrior Films whose pioneering work in mentorship and rites of passage is already shaking the world and on whose Board I am proud to serve. 

Frederick will use the footage from this Coming of Age Ceremony as well as the interviews of participants to support his World Wisdom Library on the subject of youth rites of passage and mentorship. He may also use it in his long form film on the same subject.

Opening a Flow of Resources into Girls' Mentorship 

What's next?  How can we bring coming of age ceremonies, mentorship, and girls' circles to every girls on the planet?  How can we make this happen NOW rather than in some hazy future?

We are going to gather the women. We are going to welcome all ages and all genders. We are going to work together collaboratively to spread the good news about rites of passage and mentorship for girls, and to empower women locally, globally and online to mentor girls, lead Girls' Circles, and offer Coming of Age to Girls. 

We are going to open a flow of resources into Girls Mentorship!

A Collaborative Process 

We'll create this together in collaborative process that is also online, global and local and that empowers and nourishes everyone as we move forward.  Once the collaborative process begins, much practical inspiration and resources will emerge, which we'll translate into do-able actions steps in the real world and online. We are moving toward the truly possible future of impacting the lives of ten million girls over the next five years.

This process will be bigger than Journey of Young Women, and we'll be partnering with and supporting others to fulfill their own complementary visions. We will be giving away power and empowerment and resources as fast as we can. 

Please stay tuned for news about how you can freely participate in the powerful process that is about to unfold.  If you can't wait, simply contact me to let me know you want information about how you can participate, locally or online, as our project moves forward.  We'll be in touch with you!

Full Moon Gratitude

So, community, now you know why I am trembling with gratitude. Look what is before us!  One short video (and more to come) that tells the simple but powerful truth that women can work together to help girls step forward as strong leaders and wise women - and in so doing create massive beauty, deep healing and vibrant community. In these troubled times, we can change the world and we will.

That is something to celebrate. We can sing, dance and weep to sky and earth with joy and gratitude.  

We are enough and we have enough to co-create this! 

If you're not feeling it yet, stay tuned! This is going to happen.

Look for more news with the next New Moon.

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Should My Daughter Be Wearing A Bra?

"Should my daughter be wearing a bra?" is a question that some parents never pose to themselves.  Other parents are unsure. "Listen to your daughter" and "Let go of the idea that breasts are something that need to be hidden" suggests Meagan Murphy in this pithy, powerful guest post.  ~ Katharine

Does my daughter need a bra?

The decision to wear a bra or not wear a bra, or in the mother’s case, whether to buy a bra for your daughter, is one that merits careful consideration.

Breasts are emblems of nature, little buds that grow into unique flowers. These flowers are part of a woman’s body for the rest of her life, and will change as she gets older.

The impulse that these flowers should be tamped down, that breasts should be hidden by bras from a young age, is the same impulse that drives humans to disconnect from nature.

Tips to help you and your daughter make a choice about bras:

  • Decide whether or not bras are something that make you feel comfortable by either trying one on or letting your breasts be free.
  • Listen to your daughter as she discovers how she wants to cultivate her own “flowers” (breasts). Young girls hold a wisdom that has yet to be touched by societal influences.
  • Interact with nature.
  • Interact with your breasts 

The culture says we need bras to disguise our breasts

Let go of the idea that breasts are something that need to be hidden. These thoughts are one imposed by our culture, and while it is necessary to work within societal norms in some contexts, the home you share with your family can be a place of growth and comfortability.

~ Meagan Murphy 

Meagan Murphy is the producer of The Breast Archives (to be released this fall). She brings 20+ years of experience in film and broadcast, including 12 years with PBS. Meagan earned a Communicator’s Award for her work with teens and a Medical Journalism Fellowship. She also completed a 2-year women’s mystery school and Journey of Young Women's Mentoring Girls Certificate Training.

Find The Breast Archives on Facebook. Watch the trailer.

Art by Emilano Ponzi and Daniela Uhlig

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Parent-Child Communication: React or relate?

Photo by Hank Williams Thomas


You know that moment right after your child says or does something that pushes your buttons?

That oh-so-brief moment right before you say or do something in response?



That is the moment you have a choice... react or relate, command or communicate, belittle or be an adult.

That moment is a gift of time that can make a lifetime of difference. Use it wisely.

~ L.R.Knost - Little Hearts/Gentle Parenting Resources

Dearest parents, please consider aiming for parent-child communication that prioritizes connection over:

  • being right
  • teaching a lesson
  • being on time
  • being in charge
  • having the last word
  • meeting some external standard

I invite you to actually pause right now and reflect on this. Imagine, in the heat of the moment, you're upset and aiming to respond in the best way possible to your child, and you pause and think "What will help me connect with my child right now?"

Empathy for yourself and for your child would likely be a great start.

If this piques your interest:

  • Check out L.R. Knost's Facebook page which will lead you to her books
  • Read Connection Parenting: Parenting through Connection instead of Coersion, through Love instead of Fear by Pam Leo
  • Investigate Marshall Rosenberg's Non-Violent Communication. Read his book by that title, join a practice group if possible, and/or focus on NVC for parents - for example, try this article by Inbal Kashtan.
  • Take one of my courses 🙂

Regardless of whether you manage to study up on this....

Let us turn our thoughts again to that moment, that heated moment between you and your child.  As L.R.Knost reminds us, we have the choice.  We always have a moment of choice.  And we can always pause - PAUSE - if we need time to make a choice that will meet our desire to prioritize connection and communication over command and control.

Pause, breathe, and connect, dear parents. 

You will be repaid many times over for the time and effort.

Mother's Helper by Diego Rivera

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Our Collective Daughters

Our Collective Daughters


Our collective daughters! The baby girls, the toddling girls, the pre-pubescent maids, the young women.  They are all our daughters.

We are all raising all of them.

collective daughters

We have the highest hopes for them. And we see that they are facing the most challenging odds.

And so it's time to step up and live the lives we hope they will live.  

Let us be role models, mentors, and teachers.

Girls and young women soak up everything we feel, think, say and do. How we walk, how we breathe, the stories we tell ourselves about our bodies, our bleeding, our sexuality, our birthing, our aging, our sense of worth.

So let's strut our gifts and dig into our stuck places.

Let's nourish our sense of worth and see the worth of others.

Let us tune into our bodies. And truly live in our amazing bodies.

Let us include self-care as an essential facet of our daily lives rather than an indulgence.

Let us embrace our emotions as allies with important messages.

Let us listen to our intuition and be guided by our inner knowing.

Let us invite our Dream-maker to send dreams that speak to us.

Let us include pleasure in our lives, but not allow our appetites to override our integrity or our purpose.

Let those of us who bleed, menstruate fabulously.

Always, always, always, let us uphold sexuality as sacred. One of the earliest ways girls come to believe that their bodies ares shameful is when they are discouraged from self-pleasuring.  Let us speak of self-pleasure to them, so they know it is healthy and good.  And let us teach them that their bodies are sovereign, so they know that it's their choice who gets close to them, and when, and how.

Let us age magnificently.  Let's speak of the arc of a woman's life as incredible every step of the way, leading to a wise and wild elderhood.

Let's all be Creatices, seeing and creating Beauty each day.

Let's do this, for our collective daughters.


...What would you add, my sisters?

mentor girls

Art by Emily C. McPhie (both)

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Learn to mentor girls & lead Girls' Circles

Do you feel called to mentor girls?
Learn about JOYW's
 Mentoring Girls Certificate Training.  

You'll enjoy new content, new resources and new collaborative opportunities in addition to an extensive interactive resource platform offering post-graduate support beginning in 2017. 

Learn more here.

mentor girls

JOYW Girls' Circle by JOYW artist Karen MacKenzie